In college, I was dating someone and it truly wasn't working out. We both knew it. We decided to meet at the Chinese carry-out place by his house, a 30-minute walk from me.
We arrived at the same time and I blurted out, "I don't think we should date anymore." He responds with, "I need more than that. Give me a proper speech."
So he orders his food, and we sit down in the two dingy folding chairs that the carry-out place had shoved up against the wall. I turn to him and I hit him with every cliché breakup line. “It's not you, it's me … let's just be friends …”
Then he says, “Rub my belly and make me feel better.” So I rubbed his belly, and we both laughed hysterically until his food arrived.